The Older Man

"The Older Man"

--noun

1. a man with whom you are intimately related who is at least eight (8) years older than you.

2. an alluring man of means who provides for his romantic and/or sexual or interest.

3. a potential catch


The older man is exactly what he sounds like--a man you date who is older than you. Not just by a year, or three, but by at least 8 years. Why 8? Because that's twice the time you spent in college. And if you recall how long that time felt, you know that's saying something.

What to expect from The Older Man:

The Older Man is a desirable date because he has theoretically established himself in the world. He isn't interested in playing silly dating games--he knows what he wants and he doesn't beat about the bush (or waxed personal area) to get it. He is straight-forward, opinionated (and has taken time to truly think out his opinions), usually well-educated, sophisticated and, let's face it, has some foldable money handy. For some women this will be enough. They enjoy the class and feeling of being treated while out with an Older Man. Plus it's a great trick to avoiding meeting the parents--because his are probably already dead or verging on senile. But the Older Man is not without his drawbacks. They come from a difference frame of reference than you--so your joke about trying to hook up your Jem doll with Ken behind Barbie's back may fall a bit flat. Conversation may not come as easily when you have to stop to explain the newest technological advances, like Twitter, Ning and what an iPad is really for. Furthermore, some Older Men seek out women of lesser age merely for the thrill of having a beautiful, lithe young lady on their arm. If you don't mind being relegated to this status, go for it. Have some fun, enjoy the experience, just don't be surprised when they fall asleep early or don't last quite as long as the younger boys you've been passing up. So either make friends with a little blue pill, or make for the door.